GameStop Bastards.

I have been waiting months for Grand Theft Auto San Andreas to come out on Xbax (that's Xbox with a Boston accent). Today is the big day! I rolled through my office for a quick meeting around noonish just to make sure they keep sending me a check, bolted out by 1:30 and straight to GameStop! "Gimme, gimme, gimme the game!" Sorry we can't sell it until 5:00. "Bu...what?" Sorry, can't sell it until 5. "Whaaaaaaat?" Grim look, shaking head. Through my tears, "Five? What time is it now?" It's 2:00 sir, sorry again. "Is it in the store?" (I'm glancing around him, over his shoulder, behind the counter) The only other employee in this empty store senses trouble and comes over. Sorry sir, their not in yet. "Liar..." Our manager will bring them in and they will go on sale at 5:00. Whining, "But I'm here now, I left work and everything for this..." Sorry sir, come back at 5:00. Well, here I am killing time until 5, which is just fucking stupid. I'd usually just grab some beers to fill the time but I'm too banged up today for that, so I decided to write a little.
Why am I banged up you may ask? Well, the fellas all got together to honor big Karl with a little party. We had a couple of schnapps, shared a lot of camradery (sp?), and played a spirited game of canasta. We let Karl win, which was really the highlight of the evening. That's all I'm allowed to say about that, though in the future if you happen to find yourself around some young ladies that don't know you, refrain from breaking out your collection of serial killer quips. Suppose someone is in a...vulnerable position, this is not the time for, "you sure would look great in the trunk of my car!" line. Sure, it's meant to be complimentary, but it comes off as a little creepy. Live and learn. Definitley do not offer to show them your collection of human teeth, just a little too personal. Anyhoo, I was not feeling too great yesterday and comforted myself with some wine spritzers and cigarellos. I must have been pouring a little heavy cause I had a bit of a swollen head this morning. Okay, truthfully I was a shaking, sweating mess. Luckily my boss was out today so I didn't have to fake it, was just my usual insolent self. Worst fucking thing though was getting an email announcing Chris Todd's bachelor party in a month. Who sends this out on a Monday morning? I'm gonna punch him in his fucking face for that. That's a Thursday afternoon email. I already yelled at him about it and he apologized, though he still better duck next time I see him. AAahhhhhh, it's only 4:23! Hurry up time, hurry up! Hey, here's a cool web site, it's old and has the guy critiquing kids drawings, good time killer.
http://maddox.xmission.com/
Beach house seems to be going a little nuts, I'll be down this weekend and try to restore order or fall down trying. I'll be flying solo ladies, so prepare yourself for my best serial killer themed pickup lines. "Your eyes are so beautiful, I'd love to see them in a mayonaisse jar." "I only need two things, your head and a long stake sharpened at each end." Lucky bitches. It's 4:29 and I'm getting revved up! Going to see Pedro pitch with the Mets tomorrow with Shal. Should be cool, if anyone fucking cares...Alright I can't focus, GTA motherfuckers!